Speaking Thai, or Trying To

                 "A little knowledge is a dangerous thing."

     The Northwest Airlines flight banked onto its final approach into Don Muang International Airport in Bangkok. Tightening my seatbelt, I stared out at the lights freckling the dark landscape. I was eager to be back in Thailand--my third trip in two years--and this time I was prepared to communicate. For seven months I had been self-teaching myself pa-sa Thai, Thai language, using a book and audio CDs. I was ready to hit the streets talking.

 

      My first opportunity came while standing in the Immigration line. I suddenly realized that I had the Immigration card, but not the Customs card that my friend was holding. A uniformed lady was passing by and I gestured to my friend's slip of paper, saying, "Khorthort khrap, mai mee khrap." ("Excuse me, I don't have"). She not only understood me, but must have felt I was fluent, for she rattled back a chorus of melodic syllables, none of which made sense to me.  Deciphering the total confusion which washed over my face, she changed her tune and language. "Customs, Customs," she said in English before scurrying off.

 

    

   I have had similar experiences in Mexico, where my Spanish is profoundly better than my Thai. Say something with the right accent and all hell breaks loose. One of the first expressions to learn in any foreign language is "Slow down, please!"

 

      Thai is not that hard a language to learn, but it's the pronunciation that can do you in. While there are no verb conjugations nor plurals as such, there are 5 distinct tones and the same word can have totally different meanings depending on inflection. Klai, for instance can mean "near" or "far" depending on the tonality. Imagine asking someone "Is it near?" being told "yes" and then proceeding in the indicated direction for miles and miles and miles because your tonality was misinterpreted!

 

      Often my brain would work a little slowly. Each morning, while at breakfast in the Tarntawan Hotel, I tried to speak as much Thai as possible to the waitress when ordering. On the third day, I arrived at my table in white shirt and tie. The waitress made a comment I didn't understand. I asked her to repeat it and I still came up with a big zero. I shrugged and in English she said, "You work today."  As she walked away, the fog lifted and her Thai words were impressed on my mind with the clarity of stars in a desert sky: "Wannee, tham ngarn." Oh, well, maybe next time.

 

     My communication was enough to speak with new and old friends and ask about their families, whether or not they enjoyed their work (and why they did or didn't) and what they liked to do. In Thailand at large, I was able to give taxi drivers directions, order ice for my drinks purchase goods from street vendors and ask where was a good place to eat. More importantly, I was able to ask, "Where is the bathroom?"--

   It was all serendipitous, however. I could say something to one person and receive a blank stare; with another person, I could communicate. A Thai gentleman in a bar said to me in English, "You have been to Thailand three times, why can't you speak the language?"  A bartender at another bar complimented me: "You have only spent a total of three weeks over two years in Thailand. How can you speak Thai so well?"

 

      If you are going to Thailand--or any foreign country--in the next few months, give the language a shot. You won't be laughed at for trying. By attempting to speak in the local tongue you are communicating much more than words, you are validating the culture, country and people you are visiting.

 

      Two good sources are: Colloquial Thai: A complete language course by John Moore and Saowalak Rodchue. In is a book and two audio CDs and is available through Amazon.com

On the Internet, check out Foreign Languages for Travelers.

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                                Last updated January 10, 2000.   Email to [email protected]